Magic Moment or Mayhem? How to Heal from Birth Trauma
Giving birth can be one of the most magical moments in one’s life… except when it isn’t. It’s true that for a lot of people, giving birth is a wonderful experience. But for others, it can be a traumatic moment for a variety of reasons, and that’s nothing to be ashamed of.
We all deserve to heal from trauma, birth trauma included, but it’s not an easy task. In order to help you figure out how to heal, here is a list of the key things to keep in mind as you try to move forward after a moment of trauma.
Be Kind to Yourself
Trauma is difficult to deal with. Birth trauma, in particular, is tough. You spend months waiting for a moment that everyone tells you will be magical, but that’s not how it turned out. The most important thing to remember is that what happened isn’t your fault. You’re not a bad person or a bad parent because of something that was out of your control.
It’s not easy, and you need to give yourself time to heal, time to let go of the blame and forgive yourself. We tend to be our own worst critic, so if it helps, treat yourself the way you would anyone else: with patience and compassion and support. And if you can, seek help from the people around you. Having people on your side when trying to heal from birth trauma is invaluable.
Consider Your Emotions
It may seem easier to dismiss your feelings over the matter, maybe belittling the events that caused you so much pain. But in the long run, that’ll do more harm than good. Instead, it’s important to sit down and validate your emotions, validate your distress.
What happened to you was traumatic, and it’s okay to acknowledge that. It’s okay to acknowledge the pain you went through. And it’s more than okay to acknowledge how this experience has affected your feelings toward your own body or even your child.
In order to shed your trauma and rebuild yourself and your confidence after it all, it’s important to know exactly where you’re starting this journey. For that, acknowledging and accepting your emotions is key.
Talk About It
Sometimes, writing down our experiences helps us process what happened to us. You could write about your birth trauma in a private journal. Or, if you’re okay with sharing your experiences, you could write down what happened in an article, or a blog post, or maybe a letter, and share it with someone else.
If you prefer talking to people face-to-face, instead of writing, then finding people to talk to is essential. It could be a family member, your partner, or perhaps your closest friends. You might want to try finding people in your area who’ve gone through the same kind of trauma as you. Plenty of people have experienced birth trauma, so you’re not alone in your struggles. It may help you to talk with people who understand.
Reach Out for Help
Sometimes, talking to the people closest to us holds us back from sharing the full picture. We’re not always comfortable sharing the deepest parts of ourselves with the people we surround ourselves with. This is where I come in. Counseling is a good way to talk about all this trauma you’ve gone through. It’s a safe space to talk about what you don’t find easy to say, and a safe space to work through your emotions and experiences to get back on your feet.
If you find yourself needing help, then don’t be afraid to schedule an appointment. We can work on your trauma together and help you heal. You can also learn more about how Mindful Reflections can support you by checking out our Birth Trauma Therapy page.