Are You Feeling Hopeless After Pregnancy Loss?

Has the loss of your pregnancy or infant made navigating day-to-day life seem unbearable? Have you isolated yourself from friends and loved ones because you feel like no one wants to hear about your pain? Do you spend so much time trying to console others you haven’t focused on your own grief?

Maybe your distress is compounded by tension between you and your partner because you’re both suffering and neither of you is sure how to support one another. Or perhaps you had to terminate your pregnancy for medical or personal reasons and the decision has left you feeling guilty and ashamed.

The Effects Of Miscarriage Or The Loss Of A Baby Can Be Overwhelming

woman-standing-against-a-wall-crying-about-her-pregnancy-lossAs you’re going through the normal motions of your life, you might feel disconnected, like you’re watching someone else from afar. Maybe you struggle to focus at work or you’ve lost interest in your hobbies, even if those things seem like they shouldn’t be affected by your loss. 

Your social life might even be altered. You may become angry when someone announces their pregnancy or welcomes a new child. Or perhaps you volley between dismay and relief when friends don’t ask how you’re doing because you want support, but you’re not sure how to talk about your experience.

Even though the loss of a pregnancy can feel unbearable, counseling can help you process your grief and start to feel like yourself again.

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More People Are Coping With Pregnancy Loss Than You Might Realize

Pregnancy loss is a sensitive topic, which means many women don’t feel comfortable sharing their deeply personal details with others. So as a society we tend to think it happens less often than it actually does. The reality is, as many as 20% of pregnancies end in miscarriage before twenty weeks.[1] Another 24,000 stillbirths happen in the US each year.[2]

Even though pregnancy loss is more common than most realize, it doesn’t make the experience any less painful for those involved. Navigating grief after miscarriage is a complex process, complicated by the fact that most people are never taught how to manage loss, mourn a loved one, or deal with intense and overwhelming emotions.

It Can Be Hard To Find Support

Grieving the loss of a child is a time when many women need a helping hand but, unfortunately, find themselves alone. In our culture, pregnancy loss is a hushed topic. It’s often the case that those who haven’t experienced the loss of a pregnancy or baby don’t know how to offer support, so they say nothing at all.

For many women, reaching out for support isn’t easy. They may irrationally blame themselves, thinking there was something they could have done to prevent their miscarriage. Sometimes women end up suffering in silence because they don’t want to burden others with their pain.

However, your grief and pain don’t have to last forever. With counseling, you can find the enduring emotional support you need to work through the trauma of pregnancy or infant loss and reclaim your future.

You Can Process The Grief And Emotions With Pregnancy Loss Counseling

Pregnancy loss is a devastating experience that impacts every area of your life, which is why I take a whole-person approach to healing. My goal is not to force you to move on or to make you  forget your baby or the pain you have had to endure. I understand that the love you have for your baby is never ending, and I also know that that love will carry you through this difficult time.

I want to help you learn how to process grief and the wide range of emotions it stirs up. Therapy for pregnancy and infant loss is about helping you find a way to integrate your loss into your life story while still allowing you to find peace.


What To Expect In Therapy

In our sessions, I will incorporate strategies that allow you to process your loss on a deeper level than typical talk therapy can accommodate. During our initial appointment, I will ask about your current challenges, background, support systems, and interests to learn how to help you get through the hard times.

We won’t spend every session talking about or rehashing your loss. We also don’t want to push down the pain and pretend everything is fine. Instead, I will teach you ways to work through your suffering so it’s no longer overwhelming you. Then we can work to develop strategies to help you start putting the pieces of your life back together.

My Approach To Helping You Heal

Both the brain and the body hold on to pain and trauma. My approach teaches you how to work through your grief, processing your loss on both a physical and psychological level. Doing so will help you release the pain stored in your body while still giving you the ability to remember and honor your pregnancy without feeling overwhelmed by the memories.

As you walk the path through your grief, I’ll help discover your new normal and get back to your life. I will give you tools to help you reconnect with those who are most important to you. You will also learn powerful strategies for managing emotions, navigating unexpected reminders, and honoring your loss that can carry you through the hard moments long after therapy has ended.

With counseling you can regain your sense of self, start healing the tension between you and your partner, and build up your networks of emotional support. I believe there will be a time when you will be able to walk out of a session loving and missing your baby, but also knowing you still deserve joy and an opportunity to thrive.

You May Still Have Concerns About Counseling For Pregnancy Loss…

Will I ever feel like myself again?

 Experiencing pregnancy loss can seem unbearable, and it may even feel like large parts of you will never be the same, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. While nothing happens overnight, with hard work and the right support, it is possible to move through your grief and feel more like yourself again.

I’m dealing with the pain on my own, so how would seeing someone help?

 Because you are the one who carries your grief, it can be tempting to cope by staying busy and distracting yourself so you don’t have to deal with the pain. However, without support, eventually important pieces of you can get lost until you wake up one morning and don’t know yourself anymore.

By seeking outside help, you have the opportunity to rebuild yourself from the ground up with the help of an ally who can hold your pain while you heal. Rather than burying memories and emotions, counseling can help you integrate the loss of your pregnancy or infant into your life in healthy, transformative ways.

Will I have to talk about the loss?

 While talking can be cathartic, it is not where true, lasting healing happens. With the innovative strategies I use, we won’t spend all of our sessions talking about the loss. We spend more time imagining who you want to be as you move forward.

With Therapy You Can Rediscover Your Hope And Start To Feel Like Yourself Again

Getting back to normal life doesn’t mean forgetting about your baby. In fact, it’s just the opposite. Counseling can help you hold space for your pregnancy loss and rediscover your hope for the future. Call Mindful Reflections to schedule your free, 15-minute phone consultation.

Shaina Feingold, LCSW

Shaina Feingold is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Perinatal Mental Health Specialist. She is certified in Brainspotting, Reiki I & 2 Practitioner, and founder of Mindful Reflections.  She received her Masters in Social Work from California State University, Los Angeles with a focus in trauma and chronic stress.  

Shaina supports those who face obstacles on their motherhood journey.  She aims to help women and birthing people see that they are not defined by the challenges they have endured, and that healing is possible.

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