Shaina Feingold
“The path you will take is unknown, and the uncertainty of that path will take you to places you never imagined”
My Journey To Becoming A Therapist Was Not Typical
I didn’t dream about becoming a therapist. I was not the person everyone went to when they had a problem. In fact if you would have told me that I would become a Licensed Clinical Social Worker I probably would have laughed at you. I was not very in touch with my emotions and did not open up about my own struggles.
My plan when I was in college, at the University of Maryland, was to work for the government. In fact, I had a position with the Department of Homeland Security in their immigration fraud department. It was far more interesting on paper. I did not find it satisfying sitting behind a computer reading about people’s stories. I needed something more! I wanted to hear people’s experiences myself, not just read about them!
It was that epiphany that led me to get my masters in social work. I realized I had a passion for hearing people’s stories and understanding the world from their point of view. I believe everyone has a story to share and that those stories have meaning. I know that, because I too have a story, and as I got older it’s my story that led me to specializing in maternal mental health.
So What Is My Story?
When I was 8 years old I was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis (CF). Of course living with CF is definitely a challenge. I would be lying if I said it wasn’t. Managing my health, motherhood and a career is not easy! Yet, for much of my life I held the belief that if I ignored my problems they would go away. I believed that talking with a therapist was a waste of time. No amount of talking about how CF impacted me would make my struggles disappear. This was my life and nothing could change that.
Then I tried to get pregnant and the struggles pertaining to CF came to the surface. I struggled with fertility and while the true diagnosis was “unexplained infertility”, I knew the CF was the cause. I became very frustrated and angry with my situation. I was watching friends and family fall pregnant (sometimes without evening trying) and I was devastated. That took a huge toll on my mental health.
Unfortunately, I Still Didn’t Feel The Need For Therapy
When I became pregnant through the magic of western medicine, everything changed. If I thought my mental health was bad before, oh boy did it plummet. My pregnancy was tough! My health deteriorated quickly, and with it my mental health. I finally made the decision to see a therapist.
I worked with a couple different therapists because ultimately you have to find the one that fits your personality and your needs. However, everyone just wanted to talk. I wanted to heal! I told my story 10,000 different ways, but nothing ever changed. I would feel satisfaction after a session, but nothing long lasting. To me that felt like a band-aid. As a result, I pressed the pause button on therapy. As I transitioned from being pregnant to being a mom I didn’t have the time or energy to sit and talk about my struggles. Who has time to not feel or see progress?
My Motherhood Experience
When I became a mother I thought I was ready for it, but it turns out nothing could prepare me for what was to come. No matter how hard I tried, I could not keep up with everything that was expected of me. I became severely depressed and anxious. Not only did I struggle mentally, but my physical health was in the toilet as well. There were moments when I felt like my legs weighed a thousand pounds and getting off the couch seemed like an impossible task.
At some point I realized I couldn’t continue the way I was going. I couldn’t be present for my son and that was devastating to me. Here I wanted motherhood and I couldn’t be the mom I had dreamed of being. That’s when I realized I needed to seek out therapy again, but this time I needed to find a different way. That is when I found Brainspotting.
For the first time I was able to not just talk about my experiences and trauma, but actually process them on a deeper, more profound level. I was healing those old wounds! With a combination of weekly brainspotting and a new miracle medication for CF, my life turned around. The emotional pain slowly dwindled and I am finally able to be present for my children.
More than just CF
Many people when they hear I have a chronic illness, see me as sick and fragile. However, CF does not define me, just like whatever you are going through does not define you. I am someone who enjoys running after my children, hanging out with my friends and family, petting my dog, Cali, playing board games, listening to music, and watching a good movie.
Furthermore, I have made sure to never let CF stand in the way of my dreams. Despite the challenges I face juggling motherhood and my health, I have had the opportunity to live in different cities, including Minneapolis, New York, Los Angeles, and Sydney, Australia. I have also gone bungee jumping, skydiving, and boogie boarding down class four rapids (I do not recommend that).
I don’t want you to think that I never have hard days, I do! Unfortunately, life has its frustrations, which we can’t always control. However, over time I have learned how to manage and release those frustrations, so they don’t impact me in the same way. These are the tools I hope to provide you, so that you can live the life in which you have always dreamed!
![2023-12-26-Shaina'sFamilySession-91 woman-reading-books-with-her-two-sons-her-infant-son-sitting-on-her-lap](https://mindfulreflections.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/2023-12-26-ShainasFamilySession-91-1024x683.jpg)
Want to Schedule an Appointment?
Shaina Feingold, LCSW
1499 W Palmetto Park Rd
Suite 212A
Boca Raton, FL 33486
561-223-1524
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